The Cost of Yes

Simplicity Two.

While simplicity is created (and found) in many ways, our simplicity series is about saying no. 

Last week, I offered some ideas to experiment with saying no. Observing what happens when you say yes and creating a way to say no graciously and kindly. Let us know what your insights were from experimenting with this in the comments. 

A few people privately messaged me with their observations. 

Saying no has a price. 

There're feelings of guilt or selfishness. Especially when you say no to someone you care about. There's the experience of concern or fear when saying no to someone who can affect our reputation. There's the price of self-doubt when you wonder if you made a mistake in saying no. 

The costs of saying no are apparent.

Rarely do we consider the costs of saying yes. Because we don't do before-the-fact consideration, we tend to agree to requests that don't work for us, or for which we have little enthusiasm.  

We protect our money, our reputations, and our property. But what about our time, energy, and engagement? We safeguard the external. The internal? Not so much.

Without consideration, all those yesses indicate that you have unlimited time, energy, and enthusiasm. But do you?

Each time you say yes, you pay the price of your time, energy, and enthusiasm. And, once in a while, it'll be worth it. Those "worth-it" times can keep you saying yes, but only if you don't count the "not-worth-it" experiences. 

When you say yes, and mean no, or say it too often, you aren't calculating the time, energy, and passion that you pay. You aren't thoughtfully comparing yes/no costs -- you aren't making a deliberate choice. You aren't considering the impact on your life and everything you care about. 

Let's investigate that this week. Here're some journal inquiries this week:

1. Consider -- What's the price when I say yes and don't mean it, or honestly can't carry out the commitment I've made? 

2. How much time did my not-thought-through or grudging yesses cost me today? 

3. Journal: In what ways do I pay the price of my energy and enthusiasm in these yesses that ought to have been nos? How does this affect my life?

4. How did the price of saying no compare to the cost of saying yes today?

Freel free to private message me with insights or questions.

Have a great week.